Cut the Shoot

It is time to share another video (I know...cheep blogging material, but I had to share)!

Tripp and Tyler are a well known (in Christian circles) sketch comedy duo (www.trippandtyler.tv).  Their material is fun to watch and often contains a gotcha message Jesus followers need (may not want) to hear.  This is one of those videos.

 (If it does not play, the link is Shoot Christians Say)

Whats the point?  Could it be that our language keeps us from communicating a clear message to the world ("christian" and otherwise) we are trying to impact with the message of Jesus?  Yes.

I love talking with those who are easy to read and communicate their feelings without the churchy qualifiers.  I find that type of communication authentic and reflective of many of the psalms that state raw, unfiltered truths about life and the experience of living in a fallen world.  That type of honest communication also allows for a deeper, more relevant discussion of faith.

Here are a few suggestions for dropping the Shoot Christians Say:

• Don't defend. There are times shoot is shared because we feel like God is being attacked by someone we are talking to and we do not have an answer for their complaint.  Remember, it is alright to say nothing or...get ready..."I don't know" when God (or you) is being attacked. 
• Don't deflect. There are times shoot is shared when we feel cornered by someone asking about (sometimes prying) our personal life and/or walk (used in the most authentic sense here) with Christ.  Yes, it is not responsible or recommended that you open up to everyone who asks you questions. However, there SHOULD BE someone in your life with a high level of clearance and openness is a given.
• Don't destroy. There are times shoot is shared because we want to gossip about the evil in someone's life but we have no intention on talking with that person directly.  In short, don't talk about someone if you do not have the intention of directly visiting and/or finding help (that you are directly involved with) for that person. 
• Don't discombobulate (sorry, I wanted a "d-word" for confuse).  It is easy to confuse the simple message of Jesus with a myriad of marketing angles. If you do not believe this, next time you are driving down the road, read all of the signs wanting you to come to their church. I am not against marketing!  I am against anything that discombobulates (confuses) the simple message of Jesus.  Oh, often more confusing than a billboard is the "insider" language we speak to each other about our programs and events. 

The world has enough conflicting and confusing messages floating around about Christ and His people.  Let's do our part to end the conflict and confusion by cutting the shoot.

"Your Parents are Wrong!"

 

"Your Parents are wrong!"  


I make this comment at least a couple times a year when speaking to students on the topic of moral decision making in the context of Discipleship (fancy word for following the example and direction of Jesus in how life should be lived).  The comment reflects a reality that parents, and surrounding adults, have the ability to negate and/or disqualify the moral directives of Jesus by the way they live their lives.  My wife Lisa and I often say, "We can not out teach what happens in the home or surrounding adult community. We are just not that good."  So, when teaching on moral decision making, the statement is a challenge for students (all of us actually) to follow the example and direction of Jesus over any authority that stands in contradiction with His lead.   Just in case you are wondering, I do not incite students to riot against authority (could be awesome but very irresponsible).  We are to honor our father, mother and those in authority over us (that is also part of discipleship-Ephesians 6; I Peter 2).  Still, as a Disciple of Jesus, his authority over our moral decision making is of first priority-we do call Him Lord of our life. So...

"What should I wear?"
"How should I speak?"
"What movie should I watch?"


"Should I do my own homework?"
"What music should I listen to?"
"How should I view authority?"
"How should I spend my time?"

are decisions that SHOULD be impacted by our commitment to follow Jesus as Lord.  Again, "Your Parents are wrong!" is not a statement derailing adult authority.  It is a statement highlighting the elephant in the room.  Adults (speaking to myself here) need to live with the weight that the way we live our lives before our students (our own and others) directly impacts the way they make moral decisions.  Check this out:

“the most persuasive moral teaching we adults do is by example: the witness of our lives, our ways of being with others and speaking to them and getting on with them—all of that taken in slowly, cumulatively, by our sons and daughters, our students.”
–Robert Coles, The Moral Intelligence of Children

Hard Reality:  Students with the very best, morally solid, examplar adults in their lives can make the worst decisions (it is all that free-will stuff).  


Harder Reality: If your student is making poor choices, the first place you should look is at the moral witness of your home and surrounding adult community.

The Tale of Two Stories

I am a news, talk and stories of interest watching junky (yes, ESPN falls into the category).

While tempted to join the hundreds offering commentary and opinion on the widely covered and painful school tragedy in Pennsylvania, I simply offer a heart broken prayer and wait to visit this topic when further information is made available.   It has been my experience that many will offer simplistic, passionate (right or left wing) explanations to a complex and pain filled issue.  Again, I would call all of us to pray for everyone involved in this terrible situation.

There are two news stories that really caught my attention this week.  I share these with you with little dialogue and corresponding questions for a reason.  One, the videos are easy to contrast and draw meaning.  And two, I really think it would be great if you share the stories and questions with your family, friends, coworkers or students for discussions.  Now, before I share the videos, a setting of the stage (just because) with the classic work of Charles Dickens.

The two stories I will share, in prophetic fashion, bring the words of Dickens, Tale of Two Cities to life:

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way...

Let's start with the worst of times story from a Today Show segment (Be patient with the link. It starts with a commercial and has a rather long pause before the actual story appears).

Lying

• Why would I qualify this as a worst of times story?
• How does this story relate to these words from Jesus?  “You have heard that it was said to our people long ago, ‘Don’t break your promises, but keep the promises you make to the Lord.’ But I tell you, never swear an oath. Don’t swear an oath using the name of heaven, because heaven is God’s throne. Don’t swear an oath using the name of the earth, because the earth belongs to God. Don’t swear an oath using the name of Jerusalem, because that is the city of the great King. Don’t even swear by your own head, because you cannot make one hair on your head become white or black. Say only yes if you mean yes, and no if you mean no. If you say more than yes or no, it is from the Evil One." --Matthew 5:33ff
• How can a Christian fulfill the words of Jesus and successfully navigate today's competitive world?  (if you say only do business with "Christian businesses" listed in a "Christian Business Publication" you are disqualified from answering because you are avoiding the question--not really-- really) 
• If this is the way  "adults" are living and teaching ethics (blurred lines), how do we hope to teach and hold accountable our children to moral standards? 

And now a best of times story from ESPN (Kleenex may be needed).

Lacey Holsworth

• Why would I qualify this as a best of times story?
• How does this story illustrate the reality of these words from Jesus? Some people brought even their babies to Jesus so he could touch them. When the followers saw this, they told them to stop. But Jesus called for the children, saying, “Let the little children come to me. Don’t stop them, because the kingdom of God belongs to people who are like these children. I tell you the truth, you must accept the kingdom of God as if you were a child, or you will never enter it.”--Luke 18:15ff
• What does the relationship between Lacey and Adreian say about the importance, power and impact of intergenerational relationships?
• (Extra credit question for church leaders) What does this story have to say about the need and importance of intergenerational worship opportunities? 

Choose to live a best of times story.

Why a Zippo Lighter Made Me Cry

Before I reached the office this morning, I received a phone call that Cary Branscum had already visited my office and was looking for me.  Let me tell you about Cary.

Cary is one of my ministry mentors and heroes.  He is currently serving as The Small Groups and Singles Minister at the Hills Church.  He is a veteran of various ministries and a wealth of wisdom and encouragement for all who are blessed to know him.   Besides being one of the most creative people I have ever worked with, he is also one of the most selfless and loyal workers in the Kingdom (this endorsement covers over 25 years of ministry-Cary is the real deal).  There is much more I could say about Cary. He has been and continues to be someone who goes out of their way to believe in and encourage my life and ministry.  So, at least once a month, I head over to his office, sit down in his "comfy chair"(it really is a marvel of furniture engineering) and spend a few encouraging minutes with the great Cary Branscum.

Back to this morning.

When I arrived at my office, I immediately began walking towards Cary's office to see what he needed.  As I was fast approaching his office, Cary rounded the corner and said, "I know this will sound odd, but I need you to follow me to the Men's Restroom." Odd and AWKWARD for sure! However, since Cary was asking, I agreed to follow him without objection (no, I have never taken candy from a stranger).

As we entered the bathroom, he walked to the sink counter and began opening a Zippo lighter package.  He explained all of the reliable features of the lighter as he demonstrated how to fill the lighter with fluid.  After, with one hand and much swagger, he brought forth a flame from the Zippo and snapped it shut, he handed it to me. I was humbled, stunned, a little speechless, incredibly blessed and teary-eyed.

Why did the gift of a Zippo bring such emotion?

To answer that, let's go back to yesterday (insert your favorite time travel noise).

I was waiting to visit a minister that offices next door to Cary.  As I waited, the "comfy chair" called my name, I plopped down and we started one of our life, ministry and "such" discussions.  During the talk, I noticed that Cary had a Zippo on his desk.  Since he has never been a smoker, I had to ask why he had a lighter. Cary explained how the lighter was something he had carried for a while as a reliable ministry tool (such as when a candle goes out in a wedding) but also had a deeper meaning.  The smell of the Zippo reminded him of people, some long gone, who had made a deep impact on his life.

I agreed.

That statement started another conversation about people, many of them smokers at one time, like my dad, who not only blessed our lives but served our country as well (that is where many of them picked up the smoking habit).  So, for Cary, the smell of a Zippo is a reminder of dependability loyalty, dedication and faithfulness.

Let's go forward to today (insert that favorite time travel noise again).

Cary's gift of a Zippo was not only an incredible act of thoughtfulness, it was a reminder to live a life in which dependable, loyalty, dedication and faithfulness are words spoken of me when my day's are past.   

"This Sucks!" and other words adults should consider NOT using!

Confession:  As a kid, I had my mouth washed out with soap--Yum!  Before you call CPS on my mom, I am THANKFUL she cared enough to discipline me and call my speech to a higher standard. 

I originally wanted to begin this blog by listing a number of fill-in-the-blank examples of the more overt uses of the dumbed down language (I would call it inappropriate) heard coming from the mouths of students at malls, movie theaters, fast food restaurants, and schools. However, when your student ministry friend reads the blog and is shocked, I decided to simply ask you to remember your latest visit to one of these student hangouts and recall what you heard (thanks Jason!).  And to be clear, it is not just those nasty cussin' words grabbing my attention.  How, about the lack of respect stuff?

"You are so stupid!"
"This sucks!"
"_____________ that teacher/coach/principle/student minister/officer (insert your favorite rage focus) is going to get a piece of my mind!"
"I know what the rules are but I am going to do whatever I want!" (said with any number of non-verbal signals of sarcasm)

Before pointing the finger at today's movies, music and mobile devices culture (I had to find another "M"), I would like to point out a much more powerful influence impacting today's student language woes--ADULTS!

I realize even the most careful adult can slip and say something inappropriate in front of a student--we are human.  Still, what amazes me is the seemingly increasing number of adults I have witnessed speaking the dumbed down dialect with no reservation or concern.  However, if adults don't care to watch their language, why should students?  I believe it our responsibility as adults to expect more out of our own language and those around us.

I am definitely not suggesting pulling a bar of soap out every time you hear a student or adult drop their favorite expletive and/or less than appropriate word in public.  I am suggesting the following:

• As an adult, expect more out of your own word choices--students are listening. I am not saying you need to bring back the king's language or outlaw contractions in your speech. I am saying that adults can not call student's to a standard they are unwilling to keep themselves.  By the way, it is totally alright to apologize when you cross the speech line.
• Expect more out of the word choices used by the students and adults you have a direct relationship with.  It is totally appropriate to call foul when someone you care about is speaking the dumbed down dialect. As a culture, word choices will continue to deteriorate unless a standard is  raised.  Let's start with those we are in direct relationship.

Just a thought--what would happen if one of those T.V. "bleepers" followed you around and censored your speech?  Would anybody be able to tell what you where trying to communicate your use of the dumb down dialect?